The word 'Sikh' originates from the Sanskrit word
shishya, meaning a disciple and
seeker of the truth. Sikhs believe in the existence of only one God,
and in the teachings of the 10 Gurus (religious
leaders or teachers), embodied in the Sikh Holy Scripture, Sri
Guru Granth Sahib. Sikhism teaches the universal ideals of honesty,
compassion, humility, piety, social commitment and tolerance for other
religions.
The Gurus taught the basic values of freedom,
brotherhood, charity, obedience, understanding, sympathy, patience,
simplicity, and piety and outlined the path to spirituality in life.
They considered themselves to be simply servants and said that they
were human and were not to be worshipped as Gods.
UK marriage laws allow for temples to be registered for the solemnisation
of marriages according to the rites of the Sikh religion. The legal
requirements to be fulfilled are those that apply to civil
marriages. However, if the building in which you wish to marry
is in a different registration district to where you live, you need
to prove to the superintendent registrar that the building is your
normal place of worship. If you cannot do this, you will be required
to give notice in the registration district in which the building
is situated after having met the necessary residency requirements.
If there is no building in the registration district in which you
live, you will be permitted to marry in a building in the nearest
registration district that has one.
A superintendent registrar may also need to attend the ceremony. If
the building in which you intend to marry is not registered for the
solemnisation of marriages, you must arrange a civil ceremony beforehand
to comply with the requirements of the law.
The Sikh marriage is monogamous. In the case of a broken marriage,
divorce is not possible according to the Sikh religious tradition.
However, the couple are at liberty to obtain a divorce under the civil
law of the land. Marriage in Sikhism is regarded as a sacred bond
in attaining worldly and spiritual joy.
Sikh weddings are traditionally arranged marriages where both families
help to choose the marriage partner for their offspring. Both of their
individual agreement is sought before marriage is considered.
An engagement (called the Kurmai) is not deemed
necessary but, if desired, is typically performed a week before the
wedding and is usually conducted at the temple or at the groom's home.
If the ceremony is performed in the temple, the Gurdwara,
it starts with Milni where, after prayers, the
families greet each other with the ritual exchange of garlands. Kirtan
(a simple ceremony and hymns from Sri Guru Granth Sahib)
is performed as people enter the Gurdwara
and, with men and women sitting separately, they stand for the Ardas
(the common Sikh prayer). It is traditional for the father of the
bride to place one end of the groom's patka (scarf)
over the bride and groom's shoulders into the bride's hands, signifying
her new life with her husband. After the ceremony, the friends and
families unite for the Langer (traditional meal).
If the ceremony is performed at home, the bride's family visit the
groom's house and in both cases he is usually presented with a Kara
(bracelet), kirpan (sword) or Indian sweets.
The bride's family are presented with an Indian outfit and sweets
as gifts for their daughter.
Different Sikh families have different customs for preparing the bride
before her wedding. Some families have five of the bride's close relatives
to stay with the bride for the days leading up to the wedding day.
They comb a mixture of henna, oil and water through the bride's hair,
and paint her hands and legs with henna designs. On the day before
the wedding, a party of the groom and his relatives, known as the
Braat (various spellings), are welcomed, given
food and entertained. The party either stay at the bride's home ready
for the early morning service, or travel straight to the wedding location.
Close family members of the same sex dress the bride and groom on
the morning of their wedding. The groom is dressed in white and, in
some communities, the bride wears colourful robes, which are usually
red with gold embroidery. The bride wears a full veil, hiding her
face from the groom until after the ceremony as Islam dictates.
Guests should wear traditional clothing if at all possible. If this
is not an option, then women should wear long skirts that are preferably
dark and vibrantly coloured, for example red or purple. White clothing
is considered to be unlucky. Both men and women should wear a head
covering and remove their shoes at the door. The guests will sit on
the floor of the temple throughout the marriage service that will
last for approximately one and a half hours.
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