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| The Most Important Guests |
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How
many times do you hear newly-weds say that they remember little about
their wedding day? This seems to be a phenomenon that affects brides
particularly. Months are spent planning every last detail of the day,
the assistants you would like to help you and the guests you would
like to invite, but how much consideration have you given to the most
important guests of all - yourselves!
There are lots of things that can be thought about in advance that
will help you notice more things about your day, helping you build
memories that will last a lifetime.
There are a variety of reasons for brides feeling that the day of
their wedding day went by in a blur. The day could start in utter
chaos; everyone around you will be feeling excited and nervous, they
will each have their own agendas and will be mentally tugging at your
skirt for attention. This stress is heightened by the amount of effort
that has gone into the preparations for this day. Everyone has made
a large investment of time and money, and would like to see everything
running as smoothly as possible. Perfection, however, is hard to achieve,
even after months of careful planning. Everyone will be hoping that
your day is as near perfect as possible.
All this is going on around you, alongside the inner tensions and
nerves that are to be expected by a bride on the morning of her wedding.
Concerns as to whether everyone will find the venue, whether the caterers
will turn up and the million other worries that needlessly concern
an already nervous mind. With a start as frantic as this, it is hardly
surprising that brides feel in a spin before the ceremony even begins.
The solution to this problem, as with most others concerning weddings,
is in planning and communication. To cut down as much stress as possible,
plan from as far ahead as possible. Decide as a couple, right from
the start, the kind of day that you would like. Try mapping it on
a large piece of paper, so you can add phone numbers and contacts
to it as you go along. Make the map the front page in your planning
folder, so you keep your original plan at the front of your mind.
Show the plan to anyone who is involved in the planning of your day,
right at the start of negotiations. This should mean that the people
around you understand the kind of event you are working towards. By
keeping your wishes in mind, you will find that when you get to the
morning of your wedding, you will find yourself on the brink of your
ideal day and not somebody else's.
When looking at the way the day will evolve, plan some time by yourself
with no interruptions. Take a moment's peace to consider the way you
feel and the steps you are about to take. This need not be a scary
experience, try to find some calm rather than feeling apprehensive
about the forthcoming events. By taking a moment to breathe, you will
allow your mind space to remember the way things look and feel.
Also, while you are in the stages leading up to the day, take time
to examine the things that cause you the most stress. If a certain
person makes you feel tense, try to plan to avoid them on the morning
of your wedding. If this is not possible, assign someone else to deal
with them. This also applies to a particular aspect of the wedding
that you feel most nervous about. As the months go by, you may feel
that there is an element that is annoying you about the day. If the
situation does not resolve itself as the big day draws closer, plan
to avoid having to deal with it on the day by designating someone
else to take care of it for you. This will ensure that your mind is
kept relaxed, leaving you able to enjoy your preparations.
On the morning of your wedding, try to stop occasionally and evaluate
the way that you are feeling. It is important to feel like a bride,
whatever that means to you. Don't allow people to fuss over you, as
this could cause you to feel more flustered than is necessary.
When you arrive at the ceremony venue, take a moment to compose yourself.
It is likely that you will be walking into the room or church, either
accompanied or alone, and you will feel more confident if you can
stand tall and make an impression on your entrance. Take a moment
to feel the part of a bride, don't rush!
Here, and throughout the day it is most important to breathe. This
may sound obvious, but try to be aware of breathing during the day.
Deep breaths will help you to feel more relaxed and able to take in
the scene around you. Your memory will function more effectively if
you are calm; it will be able to take more in and you won't feel as
if you're in a daylong whirl.
Try also to take a moment to look around the room, especially at your
reception. There will be lots of scenes that the videographer may
not capture, such as young bridesmaids yawning or couples having minor
disagreements whilst dancing. All of these things go to make up your
day, so look around and seize the snapshots that will form your personal
memories of your day.
Equally important is the need to connect with your new husband. Take
a few moments to have a chat and share the way you are feeling. This
way you will share the experience together. You may have noticed different
things that you can talk about; meaning that you will be more likely
to remember details of the day later.
It may be worth considering the amount of alcohol you intend to consume
during the day. While it would be a shame not to have a drink or two
to celebrate you special day, try to avoid starting too early. Many
brides are persuaded by their bridesmaids to open a bottle of champagne
while they are getting ready. This will probably mean a first drink
around 11am, much earlier than most people would consider under normal
circumstances. Don't allow the desire to celebrate get in the way
of the way you will remember your wedding day. Instead compromise,
have a Bucks Fizz instead! By controlling your alcohol intake throughout
the day, you will enjoy the experience of getting married, and still
be in a fit state to enjoy your first night as husband and wife.
Above all, take time throughout the day to stop and absorb the atmosphere.
Many friends will be around you, many hours of preparation will be
coming to a climax, sit back and enjoy them! This way you will feel
truly a part of your own wedding.
If you still have any unanswered questions about your wedding,
please post your question on our Wedding
Forum.
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